Real Vampire Community Personal Safety
& Privacy Awareness A
sobering message to the participants of the vampire community The vampire community was formed in part to promote the
well-being of its members with a supportive social network. We've done an admirable
job in promoting safer feeding practices, sensitivity and acknowledgment of
donor concerns, and sharing the most effective ways to manage or conceptualize
vampirism. We've supported one another as we discovered that it was acceptable
to form our own identities, even if those close to us can't or won't be
supportive. Despite our advances, we’ve fallen short at protecting our
community from exploitation by both outsiders and subversive participants who
exist among us. The most visible members of the vampire community should strive
towards being more open to newcomers and willing to work with them on finding
responsible resources. When newcomers find themselves in a leaderless
environment they are more likely to encounter individuals willing to serve this
role who have less than honorable intentions. The time has come to acknowledge
and correct this problem.
Participants in the vampire community have a responsibility to one another to correctly
identify, acknowledge, and remove illegal, abusive, and predatory behavior from
our own milieu. We’re all aware there are predators and opportunists who want
to capitalize on the popularity of vampires; using the vampire community as
their personal one-stop deli counter of potential victims. Actively promoting a
cultural set of values to which real vampires already tend to aspire is the
strongest and most far-reaching way to undermine these individuals. If it’s
widely known that real vampires promote safe behavior, healthy personal growth,
and interactions between equally-powerful individuals on a level social playing
field, then it's far more difficult for predators, abusers, and opportunists to
effectively pretend to be part of our community, or worse, to fool others into
following them based on the merits of their supposed vampirism and charming
charisma.
In building the vampire community, we've created a culture that encourages introspection,
promotes individual health, and tries to meet the needs of its individuals. We
can also use these methods that are unique to the vampire community to address
dangers and promote health at the community level as well as the individual
level. We owe it to ourselves and those who participate in our community, both
online and offline, to acknowledge that the vampire community is at risk for
specific types of abuse. We must be willing to take the necessary steps to
create a culture that lessens that risk to our participants. This also includes
identifying community participants who choose to prey on others, create
imaginary lives that have the potential to adversely affect those around them,
or who commit crimes and engage in behaviors which pose a clear danger to the
personal safety, security, and livelihoods of law abiding participants in the
vampire community.
I.
Avoid Enabling Or Encouraging Outright Fantasy
When an individual participates in
discussions solely on the internet, others can only judge who they are as a
person by what they write. While the same can be said for those who choose to
reveal selective sides of themselves over the telephone or in person, it’s less
likely to occur with the same degree of success. We’re a non mainstream
community, whose discussion topics include spiritual or occult themes, and
these themes can appear dramatic, compelling, and intense. We understand that
simply by virtue of existing, a community dedicated to the support of real
vampires will inevitably attract people with unstable emotional or
psychological conditions who are drawn by the appeal of the fantastic. We must
work to explicitly distinguish the vampire community's disposition towards the
dramatic from facetious rhetoric. It’s detrimental to us all to enable anyone’s
confusion of fantasy with reality.
Our community has a strong appreciation for personal expression, which has given
participants a wide margin of acceptability in use of dramatic and
fiction-derived language, but we're reaching the limits of what the community
can tolerate without becoming abject enablers of outsiders' ego-based fantasy
and role-playing behavior. A culture appreciating and rewarding precise
communication is far more valuable to us than a culture which allows
metaphorical language to pollute the discussion with drama while helping predators
blend in. Imposed social hierarchy, assigned personal titles, and arbitrary
laws derived largely from role-playing games are counterproductive to
protecting the community from abuses. We must be able to discern legitimate
community members from outsiders or those who have simply borrowed terminology
in hopes of a quick assimilation and a naive fan base who’ll succumb to their
wishes or possible ulterior motives. Many predators aren't easily identified as
being either unstable or violent. The most dangerous are often those who are
the most charismatic; assimilating into the crowd and rising through the ranks
until they obtain the level of recognition or respect necessary to carry out
their actions. If you have a feeling that something is not "right"
about someone then you should perhaps listen to your intuition; especially if
others are in agreement.
Time is a valuable commodity, so we resolve to only spend it conversing with
people worth our time; surrounding ourselves with those who are mentally and
emotionally stable, grounded in reality, and those who don't engage in or
encourage dangerous behaviors. Observing the actions of others and measuring
their loyalties over long periods of time will often reveal those who are truly
deserving of your company. We have a responsibility to ourselves to understand
what attracts us to someone, how they are viewed and treated by their peers,
and how they respond to setbacks, refusals, or disagreements. This is how a
safe and stable community can be built at a grassroots level: by individuals
making better-informed choices about who to interact with. Pathological liars, mentally ill participants
who constantly cause discord or whose delusions tear at the harmony of
community interactions, and attempts towards establishing oligarchical power structures
must not be welcomed in our community.
II.
Acknowledge The Ways In Which We Are Targets
We’re a community of outsiders and identity
seekers, and over time we've shared our experiences of building our hard-won
senses of self over and against the disapproval of family or religion, despite
lack of social support, or even in the face of outright sabotage by our peers.
Many of us have a personal story in our past in which we had to choose between
who we are and who someone else wanted us to be. Many vampire community
participants are drawn to our discussions of identity because they are
themselves in the process of developing those same personal tools of
self-discovery, and may be facing adversity of their own in the process. The
vampire community has become an incubator for individuals' sense of self, both
vampires and non-vampires; keeping it a safe space for such exploration should
be foremost among our responsibilities.
The vampire community has always tried to be a safe space in which uncertainty
is allowed. We allow one's identity to remain a question without an immediate
answer as individuals develop the tools to ask themselves who they are, and
uncover their answers for themselves. As a non-authoritarian culture, vampires
have always held that validation of one's own experiences need not come from
those in higher positions of respect or authority than oneself. The vampire
community has supported this idea by encouraging individuals to “discover themselves”
and to “be honest with themselves”, but we can be more assertive in reminding those
on a path of self-discovery to maintain their own autonomy: that the checks and
balances of logic and realism are better tools than the arbitrary mandates of
others and that they themselves are the only ones they have to please.
If our community is intended to be a safe space for self-discovery, then we
need to be aggressively aware that being uncertain makes one a target;
opportunists will always be there to exploit any uncertainty and any weakness
in one's sense of self. The vampire community can promote awareness of attacks
upon the self by outlining probable patterns of attack: the offering of a
ready-made identity in place of one's hard-fought search for identity;
encouraging vulnerable individuals to sever ties with their current support
network; blatant disregard of the health of a donor; asking for time, money,
personal information, or sexual favors. We must be conscious, and encourage
awareness, of the ways in which opportunists try to hijack the process of
self-discovery in vulnerable individuals.
Encouraging or facilitating association and open discussion with those under
the age of eighteen by adults is inherently problematic. This openness and lack
of restrictive access on the part of the vampire community is often looked upon
by predators as an opportunity to fulfill their fantasies. It’s simply not safe
for children or young teenagers to participate in the vampire community in
unrestricted or unsupervised social networking environments. While we
acknowledge that the search for identity is just as legitimate, and just as
personally important (if not more so) in the young as it is in adults, we must
also acknowledge the increased vulnerability of this demographic. Furthermore,
the type of discernment that we intend to encourage can only come with maturity
and experience. This is true for all at-risk groups: those new to the internet,
those who are used to sheltered environments, but especially for the young and
inexperienced. The internet vampire community
can not realistically keep at-risk participants safe from potential abuse, and
therefore can not ethically allow their interactive participation. The best way
to serve the needs of those high-risk groups is to encourage every individual
to engage in honest introspection free from the undue influence of others, and
to only join interactive participation after they have developed a strong sense
of self, and of self-defense.
Many of the aforementioned behaviors, at least in their beginnings, have
largely flown under our radar as a community. Perhaps we've seen forum postings
in which someone's recruiting members sight-unseen for their new “House” or
“Clan”, or perhaps we know someone who was told that if they really want to
"be a vampire", they should send some money to find out how. This
strikes many of us as an off-note, but we don't know what to do to prevent it
from occurring in the future. It's not an explicit illegal offense, but it
erodes our culture and our purpose. We can work against this type of
exploitation by directly addressing the problem with new and vulnerable
community participants, pointing out the techniques used to undermine
individuality, and by creating a culture that explicitly refuses to tolerate
behaviors that subvert, rather than support, a developing sense of self.
III.
Promote Aggressive Privacy, Personal Safety, & Identity
Compartmentalization Techniques
We
know that being different is a personal danger in our lives, and many members
of the vampire community take steps to avoid having people who they know in a
non-vampiric context discovering their nightside identities. To ensure our
continued employment, involvement in our children’s lives, and avoid
uncomfortable social situations, we've created a necessary aesthetic of privacy
and of separation. However, when it comes to interactions within the vampire
community, we don't have explicit ideals about how much information to share
with one another, how to trust or not trust one another, or what kinds of
protections we might be wise to employ from one another. It's not about being
more honest and open nor is about having something to hide; it's about keeping
the power over your personal safety firmly in your own grasp at all times. It's
about being aware that exposing your private information on the internet, or
trusting too easily in the real world, transfers the power from your own hand
to those who receive your trust. If the vampire community is intended to be a
safe space, part of enforcing that safety must include actively discouraging
participants from making themselves less safe.
We can create a safer community by building explicit ideals about keeping one's
personal identifying information secret on the internet and in real life to the
best of our ability. We can discourage the use of personally-identifying email
addresses, the sharing of names, phone numbers, or addresses, accessing vampire
related websites from work computers, and especially the tendency to let one's
Facebook (or other social network) serve double-duty for both nightside and
dayside friends. Unless one’s identity was compartmentalized at the initial
onset of participation in the vampire community, then that individual will be
forever at risk to possible exploitation. Therefore, it’s important to monitor
what information and conversations we engage in publicly, keeping track of what
we've have shared about ourselves with others and being more cautious before
giving freely of our trust.
Perhaps most importantly, we can remind ourselves that we can never know
whether someone on the internet is really who they say they are, and build
conventions of communication accordingly. We can discourage stalking,
harassing, or malicious "outing" of fellow community members by
promoting effective privacy as a community standard. We can teach and remind
one another how to keep ourselves safe from harm, and how to recognize when
we're placing ourselves into a situation in which we're dependent on someone
else for our safety. These are not suggestions steeped in paranoia -- they are
prudent measures in an age where our personal privacy is eroding and the means
to manipulate others for personal gain are growing.
IV.
Exercise Our Protections Under The Law
Opportunists know those outside the
mainstream can feel rejected by society, and are less likely to believe they
have normal social protections or legal recourse. This might even be true in
many places, if law enforcement is intolerant of diversity or if they've fallen
for Satanic Panic conspiracy theories. Whether hostility from law enforcement
is real or simply feared, the vampire community has a real and valuable right
to the protections of law, and we have a responsibility to call on the law to
protect both us and our fellow community participants if a predator creates
problems in our local communities or online.
No one should be afraid to report serious abuses and work transparently with
law enforcement to remove predators from our community. Likewise, when abuses
occur, it’s important to see that police reports are filed, personally record
detailed narratives and facts surrounding the event, and be able to present
irrefutable evidence when official legal inquiries are made. In conjunction
with law enforcement involvement, participants who personally experience abuses
or witness them firsthand should report them to those in a position of
influence or leadership for those in the community who may come into contact
with the alleged offender. Too often, violent and abusive community
participants can continue their abuses simply by moving to another city or
state, where the community hasn't yet heard of their record. Community participants
who have good communication with one another should be able to thwart such
behavior, so long as they are armed with legitimate data such as official
police reports, rather than rumors and gossip.
Through the responsible sharing on actionable and verifiable information
concerning crimes, we can create a culture which predators, child molesters,
and those who are abusive and violent, are afraid to approach or participate
in, because they know they'll get reported immediately, charges will be
pressed, and they'll be called out and held responsible for trying to make the
vampire community their personal playground. We can create a culture that makes
vulnerable participants aware of the potential for abuse and that real vampires
behave in ways designed intentionally to promote individual safety and
security.
By
Zero & Merticus; Atlanta
Vampire Alliance
[AVA] & Suscitatio Enterprises, LLC
July 18, 2011 -
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