View previous topic :: View next topic |
Author |
Message |
Eclecta Founding Member
Joined: 15 Oct 2005 Posts: 953
Location: Marietta, GA
|
Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:53 pm Post subject: Vampire seeks governor's job |
|
|
Vampire seeks governor's job
Fri Jan 13, 9:16 AM ET
MINNEAPOLIS (Reuters) - Minnesota voters, who eight years ago elected a former professional wrestler as their governor, may find a self-proclaimed vampire on the ballot for the office this year.
"Politics is a cut-throat business," said Jonathan "The Impaler" Sharkey, who said he plans to announce his bid for governor Friday on the ticket of the Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party.
Like Jesse "The Body" Ventura, who was elected governor as an independent in 1998, the 41-year-old Sharkey once was a wrestler, although he spent his time "The Unholiest of Kings: Tarantula" on obscure professional circuits.
"I'm a Satanist who doesn't hate Jesus," Sharkey told Reuters. "I just hate God the Father."
However, he claims to respect all religions and if elected, will post "everything from the Ten Commandments to the Wicca Reed" in government buildings.
Sharkey also pledged to execute convicted murders and child molesters personally by impaling them on a wooden pole outside the state capitol.
Sharkey told the Minneapolis Star Tribune that he's a vampire "just like you see in the movies and TV."
"I sink my fangs into the neck of my donor ... and drink their blood," he said, adding that his donor is his wife, Julie.
The field for the governor's race in Minnesota is far from complete. Republican incumbent Tim Pawlenty is widely expected to seek another term in November and his Democratic opponent has not been determined.
Sharkey said he planned to announce his candidacy Friday -- the 13th -- because that was "my lucky number."
From http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060113/od_nm/vampire_dc_1 _________________ "Love is the law, love under will." |
|
Back to top |
|
|
Merticus Site Admin & Founding Member
Joined: 15 Oct 2005 Posts: 603 Game Trophies: 1
Location: Atlanta, GA
|
Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2006 3:09 pm Post subject: |
|
|
'Impaler' sinks his teeth into governor's race
Self-styled "vampyre" Jonathon Sharkey is running for governor on a platform that includes impaling terrorists.
Dane Smith, Star TribuneLast update: January 11, 2006 – 11:08 PM
Jonathon (The Impaler) Sharkey has chosen Friday – yes, Friday the 13th – to formally announce his candidacy. “Unlike other candidates, I’m not going to hide my evil side,” he said.
Looking for something really, really different in a political candidate this year?Take a gander at Jonathon (The Impaler) Sharkey, who will launch his gubernatorial campaign in Princeton, Minn., on Friday the 13th as a "satanic dark priest" and the leader of the "Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party."
Since there's nothing but a $300 filing fee to stop anyone from running for statewide office, campaigns in Minnesota typically attract colorful and eccentric characters looking for attention. And of course, former Gov. Jesse Ventura broke the mold and got elected. But Minnesota may never have seen a more outside-the-box politician than the Impaler, also a former pro wrestler.
For starters, he describes himself as a "sanguinary vampyre ... just like you see in the movies and TV, I sink my fangs into the neck of my donor (at this time in my life, it is my wife, Julie), and drink their blood," he said in an e-mail.
The 13-point platform on his extensive website (www.jonathonforgovernor.us) offers a number of conventional policy initiatives, including emphasis on education, tax breaks for farmers and better benefits for veterans.
Quite some distance from the mainstream, however, is his pledge to execute -- by impalement in front of the State Capitol -- terrorists, rapists, drug dealers, child abusers, repeat drunken drivers and anybody who preys on the elderly.
"I'm going to be totally open and honest," he said. "Unlike other candidates, I'm not going to hide my evil side."
Sharkey's religious convictions also might be described as well removed from the middle of the road. Call it compassionate Satanism. "On a whole, those who worship Lucifer are no more evil than those who worship other gods," he says on his website.
Although he calls the "Christian God the Father" his "mortal enemy," Sharkey said he has nothing against Jesus Christ or his followers. But he thinks God the Father was a poor parent for allowing his son to be crucified.
Sharkey, 41, is receiving veterans' disability benefits because of a severe injury in the Army in 1982. On a high-altitude jump while training as a paratrooper, he says, his main parachute failed and the reserve chute opened just before he hit the ground "like a ton of bricks."
He has registered as a 2008 presidential candidate with the Federal Election Commission and says he soon will register with state campaign officials as a gubernatorial candidate.
Dane Smith • 651-292-0164
_________________ - Merticus |
|
Back to top |
|
|
Eclecta Founding Member
Joined: 15 Oct 2005 Posts: 953
Location: Marietta, GA
|
Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 9:36 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Vote for Sharkey! _________________ "Love is the law, love under will." |
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|