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Atlanta Vampire Alliance [AVA]  |  Vampires & Vampirism  |  Donor & Hunger Support (Moderators: Merticus, SoulSplat, Eclecta, Maloryn, Zero)  |  The Act 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
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Author Topic: The Act  (Read 3944 times)
giselle
Level 2 Contributor
**
Gender: Female
Posts: 18


To help communication between vampire & donor.


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« on: August 18, 2010, 07:47:22 PM »

In sharing this, I hope to shed some light from this Donor's experiences and feelings for the benefit of others. I am a Sang Donor, and have been for almost five years now. I have to come to think of donating as "The Act." There are no adequate words to describe how the Act feels. I know that if I do not participate in the Act every so often, I suffer for it. I don't want to be turned and I'm not out for popularity. I know I am a Donor as surely as a Vampire knows that they have a need. My need is to give.

I must be clear on this point: I do NOT participate in the Act because I am crazy, depressed, or a cutter. I do NOT exchange money, sexual favors or anything else for that matter. It's not dinner and a movie, it's not a date. I sincerely want to help, and I need the exchange as well. I don't expect to be treated like royalty, or to be asked to treat anyone else like it either. That being said, it cannot be ignored that there is a relationship that forms of a sort. At the very least, I think it's kind of silly to try and give to someone I can't at least call friend. I don't know how you could get impersonal with someone who has shared themselves with you so intimately, do you?

What makes me crazy? When I offer to a vampire and they spend all their time searching for an ulterior motive. .It can be hurtful when a vamp treats the exchange as though nothing else about me is worth associating with excepting my blood .I do NOT have to be crazy to do what I do, and please keep in mind vamps, there is a bond that develops, like it or not. If you start taking from a Donor,  you have to recognize that that bond is going to exist. It's absolutely imperative that you talk with your Donor about boundaries and STAY HONEST.

There is nothing in the world like feeding one of you only to be thrown away like a piece of trash. Those wounds take a long, long time to heal. Take care with those that give to you, we may not be fragile, but our feelings can be bruised as quickly as anyone else's.

What do I get out of donating? A relief of my burden, an opportunity to talk with someone whom I can befriend, who understands my need to donate;  and a chance to help someone who I know is truly in need. The Act cannot be treated like a one night stand. For me to allow the kind of bond that exists after a donation, I have to at least know that I will hear from the person I gave to again, that they will take me as I am and expect nothing that wasn't discussed.

I make sure to let any vamp I donate to know that I am an empath. This means that a certain amount of "drama" should be tolerated by them;  they, of course, are free to choose not to feed from me if they can't handle that. My emotions are not always mine, and I do not always deal with the backlash of that as well as I would like. That''s what makes it so easy for me to be understanding when a vamp comes to me hungry and moody. I can completely understand being a little out of control of one's self.

Of course I strive to get a better grip, it's no fun for me to bawl my eyes out when I'm deliriously happy. That "this is too good to be true suspicion vibe" that I get from many vamps on their first feeding is hard to shake off too. Being empathic, as many of you know, gives someone an awful lot to deal with. For those of you who do not know much about empathy, have a look at this:    <a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/yJi_-ZoSr2I" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/yJi_-ZoSr2I</a>

It can be very rewarding to give,  I do not want to discourage anyone who feels the need to give from doing so, but I do want to issue a caution. For Donors, be VERY clear on what you expect to your vamps. Vamps be VERY clear to your Donors as to what YOU expect. Honestly can save alot of hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and sometimes prevent some pretty dangerous situations. Be smart, care for one another, and most of all, look out for yourself. Don't get into a relationship with a Donor just because you are hungry and you think it's the only way they will feed you;  or the other way around either.

I've made mistakes with this in the past and have suffered for it. It's my hope that by sharing my experience, I can save someone else the pain I went through.

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Sang Donor/Emapth
Plump Black Swan
Level 3 Contributor
***
Gender: Female
Posts: 60


♥Let Flights Of Angels Sing Thee To Thy Rest♥


« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2013, 11:07:16 AM »

Greetings unto you Giselle.
 That was/is the most informative post that I have come across about being a Donor. I am truly enlightened at this very moment. I now have a greater understanding.

After reading your post, I hope you will find the time to answer my question?  I will be sending you a private message.

Thank you.  Smiley
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♡May your days be short & Nights everlasting♡
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